Daily Bread

"Give us this day our daily bread" has taken on new meaning in our household. Over the last 2 months our income has decreased by around 20 percent due to circumstances and choices we have made. We've become very creative with our meals, and much more conservative with our gas. We've shuffled bills around and been late on a few. Our lifestyle has changed in many areas.

My husband really struggles in the area of worry. (I think we all can fall into that trap pretty easily). Especially when it comes to money he fights to surrender control of that area. Don't get me wrong, he is joyful about giving back to God. He has a tremendous amount of faith, but the enemy definitely knows which buttons to push. The pressure is on for him. He takes care of balancing the checkbook and paying the bills, and right now he brings home most of the "bacon." And he's a husband and father of two kids. That responsibility is huge.

I have it easier. I don't have to look at the stack of bills and the bank statements. I manage most of the household expenses. I have a lot of prioritizing to do. For instance: Can I afford the gas to town to meet a friend for coffee? Can I afford the coffee? Do we buy school pictures for our kids, or groceries and gas? So that's where I am right now.

I'm actually OK with being here. I can't explain why, other than the knowledge that God provides. I've heard that my whole life. I've experienced it as a kid when my parents went through these same struggles. I've seen it in my own life and in our family many times. I always have exactly what I need when I need it. My kids are content (mostly). We have choices. We have a very comfortable home, electricity, running water, 2 vehicles, and many things we don't need.

This morning I woke up to my husband telling me about a math error that further complicates our financial situation. But to me, it simplifies things. The way I see it is that we have no alternative but to put our trust and faith in God. As I laid there praying and thinking about the needs of the next days and weeks I made a decision. I am going to ask God what we need for the day. One day at a time. And you know what? We have exactly what we need for today. My husband has gas to get to and from work. We have plenty of food in our home. Our bills are all paid.

Tomorrow we need gas for another day. I will ask the Lord for that. And He WILL provide. How? I don't know yet, and I don't need to know. He has unlimited resources and options to carry that out. Sometimes He uses other people who generously give to us. Our families have been invaluable in their help and support. Sometimes one visit to my Mom fills up our fridge for the week. There are many people in our lives that have blessed us with food, money and other gifts. Why? Because God leads them to do so. And that is a tremendous blessing; for us and for them. It's obedience on their part, and I know for some of them it involves love, faith, trust and an opportunity for growth in their lives.

The Bible was given to show us a picture of God; who He is and how He works. In the account of Abraham and Issac, God leads Abraham to make a sacrifice. Abraham is willing and obedient to give his son, but God provides a ram to take Issac's place. When does He provide? At the "11th hour". Right at the last minute, but no sooner and no later than exactly the time of need. Many times in scripture God provided for His people. When the Israelites were in the wilderness He provided food and drink. He provided protection as they fled Egypt. He provided an opportunity for Ruth to glean food, and later gave her a husband to become her provider, her "Kinsman-Redeemer." There are many examples in scripture. These were real people with real life needs.

God has been at work since before the creation of time. I think He knows what He's doing. One of our pastors has made a statement a few times recently. He said this: "Even if God were a man who had lived as long as He has don't you think we could trust that He knows what He's doing?"

Today it's easy for me to trust. I literally have no other option but worry. And that accomplishes nothing. Someone said, "Worry is like a rocking chair. It keeps you busy but doesn't get you anywhere." What about tomorrow? I pray that if things get "easier" and more comfortable for us that I continue to look to God for my daily needs. Whether I remember to ask Him for daily bread or not, He IS the one who provides it. So today I choose trust, faith and contentment. What a way to live!

³¹ Don’t worry and ask yourselves, “Will we have anything to eat? Will we have anything to drink? Will we have any clothes to wear?” ³² Only people who don’t know God are always worrying about such things. Your Father in heaven knows that you need all of these. ³³ But more than anything else, put God’s work first and do what he wants. Then the other things will be yours as well. ³⁴ Don’t worry about tomorrow. It will take care of itself. You have enough to worry about today.  Matthew 6:31-34

"He Loves Us Too Much to Give Us Lesser Things"

"If God loves us, why does He seemingly withhold His blessings, especially when we're weak or vulnerable? . . . I'm convinced that the things we sometimes see as senseless suffering are often blessings in disguise. . . [God] loves us too much to offer us lesser gifts, gifts that somehow distance our hearts from Him. Have you been troubled by a setback you simply cannot understand? . . . try spending . . . more time thinking about God's love for you. . . It's surrounding you right now. Accept it and be grateful." --Laura Story

I've rarely been one to question God, or demand good things from Him. I do sometimes feel a sense of entitlement, though. In the midst of suffering I plead for relief, peace, the ceasing of pain. But that can be when growth takes place-- the stretching, molding. Is that the blessing? Maybe in part.

I just went through an agonizing couple of months of "leaving" a local church body whom I loved very much. God had called me to minister to them, and them to our family. The process was painful, devastating, agonizing--due to the hatefulness, judgment and rejection of some of these people. And I am still very much struggling, hurting, grieving. But was it God's best for me to stay there? I don't think so. Part of the blessing is His ultimate protection from much worse. Another blessing is His fervent guard over my soul, which was beginning to wither spiritually. And in the "long run" I trust that He has a place of health, safety and great blessings in a new place, with new people, a new calling.

 

"Now the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ Jesus, will personally restore, establish, strengthen, and support you."  
1 Peter 5:10 HCSB

What are "lesser gifts"? Maybe comfort, wealth, ease, things we label as "good". These things can definitely "distance our heart from Him". We think we don't need Him when we're comfortable. When am I closest to God? Usually in the midst of, or on the other side of pain, NOT when things are going just great and all my needs are met.

"God does not give us everything we want, but He does fulfill all His promises as He leads us along the best and straightest paths to Himself." --Dietrich Bonhoeffer

"And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus."  Philippians 4:18 NKJV

"You know the profound love that you hold in your heart for your family and friends. As a child of God, you can only imagine the infinite love that your Heavenly Father has for you." --Laura Story

One of my favorite passages in scripture is Ephesians 3:14-20.

¹⁴ When I think of all this, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father,

¹⁵ the Creator of everything in heaven and on earth.

¹⁶ I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit.

¹⁷ Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong.

¹⁸ And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is.

¹⁹ May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.

²⁰ Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think.

 

It all comes back to God's love for us. We can trust that, although we can't begin to comprehend the depth of it. Because He loves us so greatly He would never allow us to go through pain and suffering-- unless it was a "blessing in disguise" the only means to a blessed ending.

 

I know my theology isn't so deep, but it's where I am right now. The thing about God is that He reveals truth-- patiently, personally and faithfully.